To Glenn's Post:
This is an interesting topic. Personally, I've never found any sports besides tennis interesting at all, so maybe I can observe as an outsider and provide some input.
In my school, males and females participated in the same sports with the exception of football. While most sports were separated by sex, the same sports were played by both males and females. Our girls basketball team was actually the best team our school had.
Also, I remember reading someone's post and they stated that most high school honors bio class have overwhelmingly more males than females. In my AP bio class, however, there were actually only 3 males and the rest were female. There were two sections of the class, and I'm sure the other had some males, but there definitely wasn't an overwhelmingly disproportionate sex ratio either way.
Anyway-- your post, in combination with that other post and my own life experiences have caused me to wonder what other factors affect gender participation in certain activities.
For example, you say it was the types of sports people were encouraged to play. In my experience, I think males just participated much more in sports than did females, although they were the same types of sports.
In the case of AP bio..I think that many females in my school actually excelled over males because they were not relying on as many other activities for their college applications (the honors band, for example, was almost all male).
I think that in the case of your school system, more gender interplay would probably have improved the attitudes of students of both genders to each other late in life. At the same time, I feel that a lot of this has to do with family life, and whether or not one's parents take the time to teach their child how to respect someone who is different.
June 2, 2008 11:15 AM
To Tom's post:
Tom,
Like Glenn, I can identify with both sides in this case.
I'm sure that there are some women who might tend to see things at face value, and some men who might look deeper into the situation, but I definitely see the stereotype in how your friends responded.
Regardless of whether or not a nice piece of Jewelry means commitment, I do think that most women would perceive this as a sign that you are very interested in continuing the relationship in the long run. I don't think that seeing things in that way necessarily means a woman is reading further into it than a man, because even looking at something at its face value, it is clear that jewelry is among one of the more expensive gifts a man can give a woman.
In addition to this, the fact that you went out and bought it means you wanted her to wear a token of affection that you have given her. When people asked her, for example, where she got such a nice bracelet, you at some level realized she would say 'oh, my boyfriend gave it to me', sending the message that she is taken by you.
While I may be a part of the female stereotype that views things this way, I also think that sociologists and psychologists might think similarly. People who study courtship would probably view an expensive gift, especially one that is meant to be worn, as a sign of commitment.
It is interesting to me that some men would not agree. Maybe, from a biological standpoint, men are not suppose to consciously understand that by giving a gift like this they are lowering their chances of reproducing with other females by tying themselves down to one.
June 3, 2008 3:13 PM
To John's Post:
John,
I can totally relate to this scenario.
My mother is from Latvia, and has a very thick Russian accent. Despite the fact that she came to the US in her late teens, her accent is still very strong.
My mother has been living and working in the US for over 20 years, but because of her accent, people often assume that she can't understand what they are saying. My mother speaks and understands english perfectly, but because she sounds different, people often speak to me when I am with her.
The same thing is also true of my grandmother, who speaks four languages fluently. She graduated from university and worked as an accountant in the US, but because she has an accent and is somewhat elderly, people speak slowly to her.
Although it is upsetting, I guess you can't really blame the people who are doing this. In their minds, they are trying to accommodate a person who they think cannot understand them. A real problem would occur if after they are corrected, they continue to do this. This does happen from time to time and is very unfortunate.
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